i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize