as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
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