Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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