I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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