Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
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I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
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Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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