You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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