dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize