Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
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