yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having hate sex.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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