Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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