So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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