I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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