wat bout pragnant strippers??
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
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he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Randomize