When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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