I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
worst night to have a conscience
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
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