He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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