I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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