Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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