i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
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he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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