All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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