Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize