On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize