margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize