You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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