no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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