I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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