After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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