Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize