I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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