matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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