If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
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...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
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just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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