Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize