is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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