Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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