dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
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