we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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