The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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