the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize