she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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