i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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