and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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