smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Duck Duck Cougar?
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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