So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
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I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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