this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize