a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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