I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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