Texts From Last Night

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  (602): View more from Arizona

  I like to think it a success when the cops are called

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  (602): I like to think it a success when the cops are called http://tfl.nu/b8sa
  Replies (3) Good night (1215) Bad night (440) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.

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  (202): I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar. http://tfl.nu/npd2
  Replies (7) Good night (2640) Bad night (560) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"

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  (904): When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit" http://tfl.nu/bodh
  Replies (71) Good night (16350) Bad night (924) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.

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  (406): We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream. http://tfl.nu/dq78
  Replies (8) Good night (3776) Bad night (437) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.

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  (281): so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better. http://tfl.nu/ybcl
  Replies (8) Good night (3926) Bad night (1193)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  u sound so gay right now

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  (617): I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me. (978): u sound so gay right now http://tfl.nu/zm49
  Replies (35) Good night (6866) Bad night (1056)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.

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  (630): She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving. http://tfl.nu/1pg2
  Replies (16) Good night (5535) Bad night (754) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.

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  (509): They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried. http://tfl.nu/h9l8
  Replies (17) Good night (1984) Bad night (4190) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.

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  (313): Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings. http://tfl.nu/tdjs
  Replies (13) Good night (3659) Bad night (1225) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.

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  (630): Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad. http://tfl.nu/cvju
  Replies (2) Good night (821) Bad night (1632) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.

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  (317): I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one. http://tfl.nu/jdn1
  Replies (6) Good night (1358) Bad night (599) Order T-Shirt
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding

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  (613): Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding http://tfl.nu/o6yr
  Replies (6) Good night (618) Bad night (1147) Order T-Shirt
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  (209): View more from California

  I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.

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  (209): I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here. http://tfl.nu/o4b3
  Replies (5) Good night (869) Bad night (226) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.

  (1-719): View more from Colorado

  Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!

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  (719): My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck. (1-719): Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER! http://tfl.nu/1zbw
  Replies (1) Good night (1382) Bad night (189) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future

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  (+44): You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future http://tfl.nu/4nas
  Replies (1) Good night (406) Bad night (198) Order T-Shirt

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