The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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