did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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