her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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